Our love story, it started unexpectedly. We first met at our work place that time. I was already a staff there for quite sometime, while he just came from other location as a manager. It was during the end of 2008 when we first met. I used to dislike new managers that just came as I preferred the old ones. So I don't really like him or talk to him much.
I was still in love with another staff there at the time he came. But things did not work out so it ended very fast. I was asked to join for supper that my love started. I was sort of the supper gang member as I'll join them most of the time. However, I did not developed any feelings for him yet. In fact, I was with someone else that was also working there at that time. I have no idea how we started but as both of us just broke up, we understand how each other feel. As time passed, we got closer and got together eventually. This relationship did not last as well. Most of the time, I was left to face all the unhappy things myself. When my day was bright and happy, it will always turned into a stupid day for me. Not that I was angry or whatsoever that made my day sucks.
One fine night after supper, I took cab with him to go home and he told me that both my past and me might not work as we started with an unhappy past. I did not heed his advise and continue with that relationship. Indeed, it was a painful experience for me. I felt that others pitied me because of this. My past stopped me from going Bintan last year but I did not listen. I went ahead with the rest to Bintan. It was when I know I can be happy and cheerful as well. I don't need to take all the nonsense that was given to me. We were on the verge of breaking even before I went Bintan. I ended everything as I did not want to drag the unhappiness anymore.
I did not know exactly when I started admiring him. Perhaps it started during the Bintan trip. I kept wondering to myself that it will be very nice if I have a BF like him. I used to admire everything he does. But I broke up with my past wasn't because I admired him. I know it was impossible to get together as it was my wish thinking only. I enjoyed my few months being single again and I am happy. However, I slowly started to fall for him. I like going out with them as I'll get to see him. But still, I make myself believe that nothing will happen between us.
But I did not know why I started disturbing him. I enjoyed disturbing him a lot. I read about my horoscope from some one's blog and found out that if I started liking someone, I'll want to stick to him or perhaps disturb him for the whole day. It was somehow very true. I did not feel shy when I'm with him plus the rest. Slowly, things started to change and I thought no one will ever know I'm liking him. But he knew and he was the only one that knew. We started talking more and even just talking rubbish. Everyday when I go work, I'll be happy cause I get to see him.
One fine day, as usual we're just talking normally and he suddenly started asking me some weird questions. That was the day I found out that he actually likes me as well. Everything seems so real yet fake. I thought I was dreaming for the next few days. Him liking me is so impossible so I couldn't pull myself back to reality. But he was transferred to another location soon after that. I no longer have the chance to work with him.
Now that we no longer work together, but he will always make an effort to meet me. It is the first time I felt I really love someone. He is always there to make me believe we're real and he really love me. He always assure me that I'll be the most happiest girl with him. I am always moody and having pms all the time but he did not leave me instead, he tried all his means to cheer me up and make sure I am alright.
I am afraid, afraid that one day things between us might change. But I should have faith in him as well as myself. With him, I will not be afraid.
I started writing this post on the 9Th February but posting out today cause I finally finished writing. However, this might not be everything cause I might forget some details. Sweetheart, thank you for everything and for loving me :)
